I don’t understand why people are so quick to talk down on me and disagree with me when we are on the same page dealing with a common challenge. I mean so what if I’m largely silent all this while and my viewpoints somewhat differ, I face life differently from others but that doesn’t give you the right to counter-attack me that way. Life is opening up for you? Good. But for the rest of us like me, our battles are far from over.
In a survival-of-the-fittest world like this, it’s heartening that there are people who look up to you. You may mean nothing to yourself and everyone near you, but there will always be people out there who will look up to you as their inspiration. So don’t take these supporters for granted, because once you screwed them over, it’s over.
Everyday feels like survival mode in spite of my growing procrastination. No sign of the horizon nearby. What used to be natural for me now isn’t. Deflated hope, more lethargy and disinterest each day. Used to look forward to the mornings but now even sleep never seems enough. Soldiering on despite my woes at work and elsewhere is a losing game that I keep dragging on for the sake of salaries and staying strong.
After weeks of delays, I finally managed to watch Doctor Strange & Fantastic Beasts and Where To Find Them yesyerday. It was a magically light-hearted comeback for me in the cinemas after my dismal reception for Suicide Squad. My mood did lift a bit positively because of that but in reality, 2016 in a nutshell is akin to staying glued to a series finale of the year 2016. Stuck with neverending work with no holidays in between as usual even through the year’s end.
It’s tough to mentally pep talk myself up on staying positive and happy and all the rah-rah cheerleader-like stuff when my ongoing issues are far from over. How to people will themselves that way? I’m not being a pessimist here, I’m more of a realist and not the type to sugarcoat, overexaggerate or be sarcastic in my viewpoints. I wish I’m easily understood without people preconceiving negative thoughts about me. So what if I’m not (and never will be) a part of the herd mentality, does that make me an enemy although we may be on the same side of tough situations we hate?